Toppa Top 10: Fake Reggae Songs

Words by Eddie STATS Houghton

Not ‘fake reggae’ as in ‘Matisyahu’ or Eminem attempting patois but as in intentionally funny shit spoofing reggae music. Yes, for once, it is a joke thing:

10. “Stoned Lyrics” aka “Panty Itch” – Mondo Marijuana on Funny or Die

I vowed to restrict this list to professional comedians and not include goofy homemade shit that’s floating around on the internet (a note to aspiring youtube auteurs who are thinking about getting your uncle to wear a mop and do a bad attempt at patois: it’s been done.) But I looked through a LOT of new clips to fill out this top 10 and this is the only one that made me bust out laughing, repeatedly. Gal, yuh kipper clean.

9. ” I Love Breast” – Craig “Leftside” Parkes

Not really fake reggae since Leftside is an authentic dancehall star going Weird Al on his bashment colleague Vegas but too good to pass up. Minus points for not actually shooting a video, could have been top ranked if he did a full on production but even a camera-phone skit like his Sharon Burke impression (only funny to reggae industry insiders) would work.

8. “Rasta Tom” – Cedric the Entertainer on Fox

7. “IO cable reggaeton ad”  — ?

Not strictly speaking comedy but this reggaeton spoof is arguably the one Jamaican artists will find funniest. Until they remember “Gasolina.”

iO digital cable reggaeton ad by joemande

6. “Lagos Reggae” — Klint the Drunk, Ghanaian TV

Kinda hard to follow for the sober non-Nigerians among us but it’s worth watching a few times to get the subleties, and like Eddie’s Tyrone Green, it’s only funny because Klint does a pretty decent Tosh impression.

4. “Peanut Butter, No Jam” – Cedric the Entertainer in Kings of Comedy:

You have to watch him, now.

3. “Mr. Ugly Man” — Marlon Wayans on In Living Color

From the classic LP Rough & Ugly Vol. 1.

2. “Ras Trent” -Andy Samburg on Saturday Night Live:

30 years later the answer record to “Kill the White People” from Samberg and the Lonely Island crew.

1.”Kill the White People”—Eddie Murphy on Saturday Night Live

He thought they were going to sing “Day-O.” The original and gold standard of joke reggae songs. We could talk about the levels of genius in this skit all day long but it comes down to two big factors. 1) like most of Eddie’s musical impressions (Little Richard, James Brown, Jesse Jackson singing “Heimytown”) from the salad days, it actually works as music and the more retardedly simple they try to make it sound, the better it is. 2) it’s funny because it’s true.

Honorebel Mention:

“Gay Ray the Reggae Gay” – Eli Braden on Funny or Die. “Rahm Emmanuel!”